All hail the home-grown tomato.
They grow in Texas. They grow in Alaska (well, OK, I’m guessin’.) Oh, did they ever grow in the chocolate-cake-crumble soil of my grandfather’s central Illinois farm. If you grow vegetables, you’re sure to have a few to a zillion, in pots on a porch (my mom) in grow boxes in the back yard (my chiropracter) in 50-plant rows (Virginia locavore extraordinaire Barbara Kingsolver). There’s even a song about home-grown tomatoes, written by Guy Clark and covered by Colorado’s very own John Denver.
But this year has NOT been nice to nightshades. I’m hearing tell of plentiful blossoms and scarce fruit. Or puny plants and no fruit. Or fruit that won’t see red. My chiropracter’s plants are producing tomato tonnage from tree-sized specimens in plastic tubs that his Nebraska relatives brought him, already planted and ready to zoom upward. I suspect those tubs kept the soil warm in our cool spring and maybe gave them a head start, or maybe it’s just Dr. Guy’s squeaky-clean healer karma. My own tomatoes are either of the puny-plant or almost-no-fruit variety. Fellow blogger Kitt brought me in some fruits from the Stupice plant I gave her; they’re small, but yummy. Firm, sweet, not too watery, delectably tangy. So it’s not the variety’s fault.
Anyway, to console, or congratulate, as the case may be, all you tomato growers out there, I’m giving a prize away to the best tomato tale — bonus points for pictures — emailed to me at sclotfelter@denverpost.com by Friday, Aug. 15. The criteria are simple: verse or prose or recipe or all three; send pix if you got ‘em; and oh, my pals from work and my personal life aren’t eligible (sorry, buds). Yes, it’s a cheesy ploy to bring you blog-lurkers out in the open. I’ll publish the best on Digging In. And the criteria are completely subjective. If Features Editor Dana Coffield or foodies Kris Browning or Tucker Shaw come into some garden goodies they want to donate to the cause, there could be additional prizes.
The prize, so far, is a copy of Tim Stark’s “Heirloom: Tales from an Accidental Tomato Farmer.” Stark’s account of his transformation from NYC consultant to market gardener and supplier to top-flight chefs is raucous and rollicking and infused with tomatoes (and chiles and elderflowers and wine, oh my.) If you thought YOU had overplanted tomatoes, Tim’s story will comfort and amuse you. If tomatoes vine and burgeon through your waking and sleeping dreams, you’re SO not alone.
But wait: for those of you who ARE getting fruit (and I am pausing to hate you now) there’s an even bigger prize out there: $2,500. That’s a LOT of tomatoes, kids, and all you’ve got to do is bring them to the Longmont King Soopers on Saturday, Aug. 23, for the NatureSweet Best Homegrown Tomato Challenge. Details and registration stuff here, but the important detail bears repeating: The grand prize is $2,500! And there’ll be two of those big fat checks, in both the full-size and small-tomato categories. Two runners-up in each category will win $250 grocery certificates, and even that ain’t mulch money. Got no fruit at all? There’s a sweepstakes that lets you try for some green without even getting your hands dirty.
Your favorite garden blogger is one of the three judges, and … from the way my plants are looking, it’s pretty unlikely that I’ll be tired of tomatoes any time soon.
Good luck, and happy harvesting.
